soaking up freedom

When the relationship with God has broken down

Anonymous asked: I’m in a bit of a fix lately. Long story short, I feel like I fell out of love with God. I was in a place where I needed him to come through for me, and he didn’t, then I got angry, then I got bitter, then I stopped talking with Him altogether. I know it’s the wrong thing to do- but it gave me a sense of confidence, and I feel like I’m truly finding myself lately. I know I need Him, I think, but now I’m in love with the world, and I don’t know that I can come back.

Unka Glen answered: I love the phrase, “I know I need Him, I think”. A man once said to Jesus. “I do believe, help me overcome my unbelief!” I love those moments when honesty finally breaks through and kills the phony religiosity. They say every great revival starts with honest confession. In this case, it sounds like all is lost, but in fact there’s only one tiny problem here, and it’s not what you think.

It’s not the anger or the bitterness, David, who was called “a man after God’s own heart”, said this: “How long, LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart? Look on me and answer.” (Psalm 13:1, 2a, 3)

He’s not only angry at God, he’s basically demanding that God answer Him. Your problem is that you didn’t go far enough with your little rebellion. You didn’t demand an answer, and you didn’t stick around for the response either. You assumed that you and God weren’t going to see eye to eye on it, and that He didn’t like your attitude, so you rejected yourself to save Him the trouble.

Of course, finding your true self gives you confidence, and that’s a good thing. It’s good to be honest with your feelings and to be authentic. The only thing you missed is this: God wants you to be honest with Him too, even when it’s something ugly. Heck, your relationship with God was just about to finally get real, and you walked away! God would rather hear a thousand ugly doubts, accusations, and declarations of anger, than to see you take one step away from Him.

As for the “I don’t know if I can come back” part, you already know that’s horse poo. If you know anything about the Bible, you know the story of the Prodigal Son. He loved the world too, until he found out that it didn’t love him back. And after doing it his way, he not only came back, but was welcomedback with a celebration.

If you really think you’re missing something, go on ahead and try all that “wild living” the Prodigal got into. Don’t be thrown off by the testimony of roughly a hundred percent of people who say that you really aren’t missing anything worth chasing. Trust me, what the world does for pleasure, that’s about trying to make a disaster livable. 

But I wonder if you wouldn’t be much better off if you rejected the oldrelationship you had with God, and started a new one. This time making it something you can live with. That might look a bit messy, but trust me, God would prefer it that way.